According to an eye-opening story in the Daily Mail, the Pope is ready to unleash an army of exorcists to purge the world of Satan and evil and stuff. (I know it’s basically a tabloid, but the story looks legit so far.) It says that “the Vatican is particularly concerned that young people are being exposed to the influence of Satanic sects through rock music and the Internet.” Oh, that. So get ready, folks…the power-crazed Evil Emperor, wearing his fancy dress and Jiffy-Pop on his head, has decided that you are possessed by demons because you like rock music and read a lot of email.
Isn’t it fascinating how these people are still trapped in Dark Ages thinking? They really are doing all they can to keep people dumb and docile. I mean, come on…blaming demons for peoples’ bad behavior? They may as well blame it on the four humors or alien anal probes. Or maybe Bigfoot is secretly eroding our morals via sub-ether waves emitted from his hidden moonbase. As long as we’re talking complete nonsense here, why not?
People used to call Terence McKenna crazy because a certain drug caused him to see gnomelike creatures in his mind. He called them “elf-clowns of hyperspace” and he carried on full conversations with them, some of which were quite interesting. This is what the Pope should be worried about! The danger of some sort of interdimensional elf-clown invasion is very real, and it should be the Pope’s top priority. C’mon, Pope…sniff out those gnomes and smite ’em with your Jesus stick!