Sigh. The “Dexter” ending was truly unworthy of the character. The original creator of the show said (in an interview I read somewhere) that he wanted to have Dexter caught and found guilty…and when he’s strapped to an execution table about to receive a lethal injection, he sees all his victims from over the years there in the room confronting him. GAWD that would have been so much better!
Showtime Defends Disappointing ‘Dexter’ Finale
At the Television Critics Association press tour on Thursday (Jan. 16), Entertainment President David Nevins supported the storyline, saying, “I think the fundamental design of where they ended ‘Dexter’ was really well conceived. He had to sacrifice the one person who was closest to him in the world and he had to leave.”
Nevins also addressed the rumors about Showtime preventing producers from killing off Dexter, claiming that it was never discussed and that “no one even brought up the idea.”
Hollywood and Blake Snyder’s screenwriting book, Save the Cat!
If you’ve gone to the movies recently, you may have felt a strangely familiar feeling: You’ve seen this movie before. Not this exact movie, but some of these exact story beats: the hero dressed down by his mentor in the first 15 minutes (Star Trek Into Darkness, Battleship); the villain who gets caught on purpose (The Dark Knight, The Avengers, Skyfall, Star Trek Into Darkness); the moment of hopelessness and disarray a half-hour before the movie ends (Olympus Has Fallen, Oblivion, 21 Jump Street, Fast & Furious 6).
It’s not déjà vu. Summer movies are often described as formulaic. But what few people know is that there is actually a formula—one that lays out, on a page-by-page basis, exactly what should happen when in a screenplay. It’s as if a mad scientist has discovered a secret process for making a perfect, or at least perfectly conventional, summer blockbuster.
I’ve noticed a certain movie trend the past few years of having two buddy characters have a major falling-out during the third act, then having them come back and patch things up in time to save the day or whatever needs to happen by the end of the story. This happens in Pixar films like clockwork, but I’ve seen it in many other movies and I’m sure you have too.
According to this article, it seems that every screenwriter in Hollywood is writing according to a predefined set of rules — an exact formula that maps out the movie from beginning to end. This plot roadmap is detailed in the book “Save the Cat!” which the article delves into in great detail. The falling-out thing is part of the formula, but it’s only one of many predictable plot developments dictated by the book. And once you start reading about how it works, you start thinking about movies that fit the pattern and suddenly they’re a bit less impressive.
David Tennant to be remade as an American in Fox’s Broadchurch
Following a pattern established by Low Winter Sun (though hopefully not to the letter), both the moody British crime drama Broadchurch and its star will be translated into American versions, as David Tennant has confirmed he’ll reprise his lead role in Fox’s upcoming remake in 2014.
So here’s the deal: the show “Broadchurch” is airing on BBC America, a few months after it wrapped up in the UK. Some idiot at Fox says to himself, “We gotta get this show on Amurrican T.V.! Not that British crap with all those accents and ugly teeth, but on real Amurrrican T.V. with hot stars with perfect hair and stuff. Speaking real Amurrrican English, too!” And somehow they pay David Tennant enough money to not only re-enact the same series he just filmed, but to do it with an American accent. Not to mention that the ending of the show is already out there for anyone who wants to look at it, so will it really be a surprise when the American one airs (assuming they don’t change it)? Meanwhile in the UK, a second series is being written which is probably going star…David Tennant again. Think it’ll air when the remake is airing in the U.S.? I kinda hope so.
I’ll never understand why American producers think they have to remake every popular foreign show instead of — gasp! — just airing the original show. With subtitles, if necessary. Not only would the original story and characters be preserved exactly as they should be, but it would give mainstream America (especially those in xenophobic small towns) a little exposure to the outside world that they desperately need. We’re not all so dumb that we wouldn’t appreciate seeing the original version broadcast here — have they learned nothing from the American fandom of “Downton Abbey” and “Doctor Who”? And yet, I know a lot of Americans would sadly be put off by seeing something foreign on the shitty major networks like NBC/ABC/CBS/Fox.
If anything, this kind of thing shows that American producers are out of good ideas. They keep cranking out mindless family sitcoms, dregs-of-society reality shows, and endless crime dramas (“CSI: My Cornhole” is a personal favorite), so they try to remake popular foreign shows but with very little success. “The Office” was a rare one that actually worked, but many, many failures came before it. “The IT Crowd” and “Red Dwarf” are notorious examples of shows with American pilots that crashed and burned, and there were many others that never got off the ground, lucky for us. When will they learn?
Who greenlights this kind of peepeecaca? I’m absolutely stunned that this even exists, though I shouldn’t be. It sounds sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame. And yet…I kind of want to watch some of it. You know, to fully justify my outrage. 🙂
Art Bell Returns!
No, he wasn’t in an underground bunker, and he wasn’t abducted! Without much fanfare, the godfather of paranormal late night talk radio has returned to the airwaves.
Ahhh, Art Bell. I have fond memories of staying awake into the wee hours of the morning listening to his five-hour radio show, way back in the mid-90’s. I was in college and coming out of my loathsome conservative phase, discovering more libertarian ideas (hey, it was a start) and enjoying all the ridiculous what-ifs his show offered. I didn’t really believe in the weird shit he had on his show, though some was somewhat plausible. I won’t be able to hear his new show, but that’s OK. I’ve pretty much outgrown the conspiracy/woo-woo stuff and can see it for what it really is: entertainment, not reality.
For some reason we just watched about 20 minutes of Madonna’s MDMA tour video. My favorite song so far is “Hag Gone Wild.”
RIP True Blood, America’s Extremely Graphic Long-Form Sex Ed Video
Though it will likely go down in history as a show that peaked during its opening credits, it’s important to remember that there was a time, a thousand human lifetimes ago, when the series was almost as good as its opening credits or, at least, not an outright insult to them.
There was a time when the dialogue was peppered with ridiculous, quotable lines (“Who ordered the hamburger…with AIDS?
“) instead of being entirely constructed of “quotable” lines, like a sprawling McMansion where every wall is an accent wall; when the characters were accidentally campy (or, best of all, Anna Camp-y
) instead of hollowly, painstakingly, calculatedly campy; when gratuitously weird scenes about a minor character sending a text
would be thrown in—and allowed to last a beat too long—for no reason other than we’re all friends here and, fuck it, we’ve got time to kill.
I knew this was coming. This last season was so very, very bad that this will be a mercy killing… Here’s how to sum up just about every episode this season: “Hey, there’s a lot of serious crap happening! So much violence and fear! C’mon, pull down yer pants and let’s do it!” I’m no prude, but I know shitty writing when I see it.