Heads up, folks! Some scientists are going to do some sciencey stuff tonight which will lead to weirdly colorful clouds. If you see something like that in the sky, it is not:
- A U.F.O.
- The Rapture (finally)
- Buddha descending on a unicorn
- Kanye West’s monstrous ego coming to devour us all
Thank you in advance for not flipping out like these other people, mmmkay…
Citizens of Earth, Do Not Panic If Brilliant, Glowing Clouds Fill the Sky Tonight
You know your crazy relative who’s always suspicious of black SUVs? Quick—block him on Facebook. NASA is scheduled to launch a suborbital rocket from Wallops Island, Virginia, on Wednesday night, and as one of its experiments, it will eject colorful clouds of vapor more than a hundred miles above the ground in order to study ions and neutral particles in the upper atmosphere.
Oh for fuck’s sake. Honestly, people, you need to get a grip on reality here. Sorry, but this stuff just drives me bonkers… Just because the clouds do something you’ve never seen before doesn’t mean it’s a sign from God or that the “end times” are near. Even if it was a sign, what is it trying to say? “Hey look, I’m a big round rainbowy cloud”? You’d think if God wanted to give us a sign, it would be something that left nothing to interpretation. (And please don’t say your faith tells you this is a holy event, because we both know that’s quite a stretch.)
Costa Rica Cloud Formation: Scientists Explain Cloud Formation As Christians Celebrate Sign From God
One woman who posted a photo of the mystery said it looked “like the end of times.” She said the “skies opened up as if it were the end of times — It was truly a beautiful glimpse of what our God has in store for us on the day he comes back.” Another Escazu resident, Jessie Montealegre, said she was also was amazed by the sky phenomenon. “It was breathtaking,” she said. “It’s like a sign of God.”
But wait! This looks very familiar… I think I’ve seen God’s handiwork like this before!
Anyway, leave it to the killjoy scientists to burst this heavenly bubble and ruin everything with their science and reason and stuff:
However, experts said the cloud has a less divine explanation — a rare phenomenon known as “cloud iridescence.” Eladio Solano, a meteorologist with Costa Rica’s National Meteorological Institute, said the colorful effect is caused by the sun’s light being refracted by water droplets and ice crystals in the cloud.
OK, all snarkiness aside…I get that religious people take comfort in things they believe to be signs from heaven. It probably feels really good to think you’ve made contact with something “out there.” But when you start seeing an all-powerful Supreme Being in mundane things like clouds, toast, or even brain scans, maybe that is the sign you should pay attention to — it’s telling you that you’re taking this stuff a wee bit too far.
Soooo….this gal thinks she sees Jesus in her brain scan. Because, you know, Jesus chose to reveal himself in the most inconvenient of places and they’re 100% convinced it’s real and it’s OMG a miracle and stuff. Of course, to rational-thinking folks this is akin to seeing an elephant in the clouds, but that’s beside the point. What I want to know is: doesn’t this mean Jesus gave her the stroke?? Why else would he be showing up in someone’s brain? Thanks a lot, Jesus. You almost killed this woman! Next time just show up on her toast or something, OK? Sheesh….
Jesus brain scan a ‘miracle’
When Tamaha MacDonald and his wife Jennifer Lougee Mingramm returned home from the hospital after Lougee Mingramm suffered a stroke, they started looking through a pile of X-rays taken during her treatment. The pair, who live in Mexico City, spotted an unusual image in an X-ray of Lougee Mingramm’s brain.
“We were both convinced we could see a face,” MacDonald said. Although their doctor did not spot the resemblance, MacDonald, Lougee Mingramm and her family were convinced that an image at the centre of the scan depicted Jesus Christ.
Anyone who’s been on Facebook long enough has run across one of those “Click ‘Like’ to send a prayer for this sick child!” posts. And people do it, as if clicking that button does anything at all…besides make you feel good about yourself, that is.
Legal action? Seriously? So much for freedom of expression. This guy’s right: if this had been a traditional Nativity scene, nobody would have said a peep about it. If you’re so offended by this that you feel the need to threaten someone, maybe you should take a moment to examine why that is. Surely your faith and your religion is strong enough to withstand some satire…? If not, you’re no better than the Muslims who flip their wigs when someone draws Mohammed.
Ohio town threatens legal action against ‘zombie’ baby Jesus Nativity scene on man’s lawn
But just days after WXIX spoke to Dixon, Sycamore Township township ordered him to take it down or face legal action. Town officials claimed that Dixon was breaking the rules with a structure on the front side of his yard, and a display that took up more than 35 percent of the area.
But Dixon said that he wasn’t buying the explanation. “I’ve lived here for 15 years and I’ve never had a violation of any kind,” he insisted. “It’s a holiday decoration. I know if it was a real pretty nativity scene they wouldn’t be saying anything.”
Sorry, but I don’t buy this guy’s “conversion” from atheism simply by reading the Bible and asking “experts” — he was obviously not an atheist to begin with. There are far too many contradictions in the Bible about the resurrection, especially since the Gospels were written between 40-70 years after the supposed event. If you do enough reading about this, it’s quite clear that it’s not historical fact but rather than a mixture of resurrection myths which were common at the time, along with a dash of politics. Does this mean Osiris also resurrected? Or Inanna? Or Mithras? Does it really matter? Take the message of the myth to heart, but don’t confuse myth with historical fact.
How Easter Killed My Faith in Atheism
I quickly determined that the alleged resurrection of Jesus was the key. Anyone can claim to be divine, but if Jesus backed up his claim by returning from the dead, then that was awfully good evidence he was telling the truth.
For nearly two years, I explored the minutia of the historical data on whether Easter was myth or reality. I didn’t merely accept the New Testament at face value; I was determined only to consider facts that were well-supported historically. As my investigation unfolded, my atheism began to buckle.