Critter sent me a story about a group of parents (and thier children) who managed to book themselves into a hotel full of swingers on New Year’s Eve. Boy, were they surprised. Critter asks, “Is it horrible that I think this is hilarious?” Absolutely not! God, this is funny, especially if it was a Disney hotel, which I think it may have been.
“A soccer team and middle-aged swingers should not have been booked together.”
Oh, I suppose you want hotels to group customers into categories. Naughty and Nice, perhaps? Think they could work that into some sort of questionnaire? Dolt.
The families said the sexually adventurous partygoers sometimes flashed breasts and bare buttocks in front of the children as they sashayed through the hotel atrium.
Sounds like proper swinger behavior to me. Hooray for jiggling asscheeks! Then again, if they were middl-aged asscheeks, maybe they were more swingy than jiggly. *shudder*
“The kids could see through the glass atrium into the ballroom where naked people were dancing. There were exposed breasts, thongs and see-through dresses on women who were not wearing any underwear.”
Oh no, it’s human sexuality! It’s madness! Nakedness makes you a bad Catholic! Kids, shield your eyes…you must not see such things! Nevermind the nearly-naked people on billboards and in magazines and on T.V. and…
Paul Camporini brought his wife, seventh-grade daughter and eighth-grade son from Safety Harbor and said he had to “delicately explain to my Catholic school children that swingers change partners during the evening.”
Oh, that’s just deeee-licious! But why did they have to explain all this to their kids? Why not just keep your kids in the dark like good religious parents and say “Those are naughty adults doing sinful things” and leave it at that? But you know, I don’t think these parents were really all that offended, especially since they claim that they aren’t prudes…I think what they were feeling was probably more like regret. They’ll never have that kind of sexual playfulness in their lives again, ever. This is what happens when you get married, have children, and become soccer parents. It’s a law of Nature. Oh well.